I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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