thus making me awesome and them whores
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
3 2 1 whiskey
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Randomize
