I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
North Korea, Best Korea!
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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