I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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