He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Randomize
