I'm really into asian looking animals
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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