garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
