How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
