You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
