I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
