dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
