we're blogging at a bar
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
