When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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