I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
