Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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