They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Randomize
