3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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