It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize