Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
