I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
