i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
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