Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
