you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
