Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
