We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
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