New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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