So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
