The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Ladies don't puke and tell
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Randomize
