Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
