I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
