eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
