what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
