if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
