Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
