Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Randomize
