Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
