I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
