I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
