How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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