Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
