bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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