Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
