This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Randomize