you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Randomize
