I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
