Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
