I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
