Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I cockslap morals
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
