If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
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