I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
